i stayed home sick from work today which was nice in that i slept for about 16 straight hours, and that i got to hang with the puppy after being away from her all weekend. not so nice in that i have been blowing my nose every 10 minutes or so. bleah. but it was nice to spend the day at home.
anyway i've spent some time thinking about my current situation. i'm tired of going on crazy diets that don't really work. i'm tired of fighting with myself day after day about what i should and shouldn't eat. when i think about the person i want to be, that person is calm and in control about food- not overly restrictive, and not helpless in the face of cupcakes... just reasonable and restrained. i want to be in a place where there's nothing i "can't" eat - but there's nothing i can't NOT eat, either. kohtuus kaikessa, as they say. moderation in all things.
so, a few decisions. first, true to my word, i'm going to follow the advice of goetzgirl, and nix the bread group this week as much as possible.
second, i'm going to take my half-marathon training program seriously, and make time to run at least 4 days a week.
third, since i'm not going to go on a crazy diet, and i have a very hard time with meal planning and shopping, i joined a website called emeals - it's one of those services that creates a weekly meal plan for you, complete with shopping list. i selected the low-fat meal plan, and will aim to cook at home (and thus eat at home, and bring leftovers for lunch) most days of the week. their website is very pretty, and my first week of meals sounds very tasty, so i'm excited about getting started.
fourth, i'm going to dig out my p90x dvds. i never made it past about day 3 when i started the program the first time- i can do better than that. i'm not sure when i'm going to start- but i'm at least going to get organized about it.
the OTHER thing to tell you is that i got some nice motivation the other day - one of my friends just announced her engagement and honored me greatly by inviting me to be a bridesmaid. the wedding is july 28th, and i am very excited. in addition to it being a huge milestone in the life of my friend, it's also a perfect goal for me to work towards- i want to look great in my dress!
i also got a couple of books that i'm looking forward to reading... one is called "50 ways to soothe yourself without food," by susan albers (which should be pretty self-explanatory), and the other is "the self-compassion diet: a step-by-step program to lose weight with loving-kindness," by jean fain. don't those both sound nice? i'll let you know what i think of them in a later post.
well that's it for now. i'm feeling more optimistic now, with some plans, and feeling very grateful for the love and support of YOU, dear readers.
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